We All Know Premier League Refereeing is a Bit of a Joke, but Mike Dean Has to be Taking the Piss

Premier League Refereeing Is At It’s Worst Ever, and We’re Hearing Former Refs Talk About Mini Games - Grow Up

Every weekend, the Premier League produces multiple talking points simply due to poor refereeing. This can range from refusing to overturn an overturned decision to showing the wrong card to refusing to give a yellow card for a dive - it can be absolutely anything if it pisses certain fanbases off enough.

Maybe English fans are more sensitive than others when it comes to refereeing decisions because of VAR, which can at best be described as misused throughout its spell in the English top flight.

However, incorrect VAR decisions don’t boil the blood nearly as much as what Mike Dean had to say on the most recent episode of Jamie Vardy’s “Jamie Vardy’s Having a Party” podcast, in which he gave a grim insight into what truly goes through a Premier League referee’s head during a football game.

MIKE DEAN’S SECRET PREMIER LEAGUE GAMES

Ex-Premier League referee Mike Dean admits he used to play secret mini-games on the pitch while officiating top-flight matches.

Mike Dean: “We used to say, ‘Right, we'll kick off now, right? See how long we can go without blowing a… pic.twitter.com/7ITA3Z3t7O

— BoiBoi (@ToniBoiBoi) September 2, 2026

Mini Games? The Belong In FIFA, Mate

Some of you will assume that Dean said something along the lines of ‘the pressure is just too much, we can’t make the right decision every game’, to which you would respond ‘grow up, your being paid to do exactly that.’

However, it’s much, much worse - throughout his career, instead of following the play and blowing the whistle like he was trained to do, Dean actually spent time in various Premier League matches trying to do the exact opposite.

Speaking to Vardy, who is currently a free agent, Dean said, “We used to say, ‘Right, we’ll kick off now, right? Let’s see how long we can go without blowing the whistle.’ Done that a few times in the Premier League, before VAR, obviously, where we’ve gone 20-25 minutes without blowing the whistle.”

“It was just ‘let it go, let it go, let it go,’ and I used to do another thing in the Premier League - I used to stand in the center circle and I would see how long I could stay in the centre circle before I had to leave. That was just me joking about.”

At this point, Vardy and co-host Josh James burst into stunned laughter, apparently sure whether to laugh at Mike Dean or with him - it was a rather unusual take on how to referee a game of football.

Dean continued, saying “I used to kinda run round it, but not go out of it, and I got about 15 minutes once, in one game, without leaving the centre circle.”

Look, I’m sure we’ve all done things to make our jobs easier from time to time, and there is argument to suggest that Dean was either trying to avoid running or avoid player interaction in both of the described scenarios.

But the fact that he described them as him just “joking about” suggests that it certainly wasn’t a way to make his job easier - simply more bearable. The referee is supposed to be close to play regardless of where it is on the pitch, and if you’re in the centre circle while the ball is in one of the boxes, your view is automatically going to be terrible. What happens if there is a penalty shout? What do you do then?

TalkSPORT host and former Aston Villa stiker Gabriel Agbonlahor wasted no time in tearing into the now retired referee, saying, "He's trying to be funny, but it's not funny. Jamie Vardy and the other guy aren't laughing because they're in shock. You're not funny Miek Dean and that sums you up."

😡 "Prat!"

😤 "What an idiot... it's not funny!"

Gabby Agbonlahor is disgusted by Mike Dean revealing he'd play secret games while he refereed Premier League matches! 🤬 pic.twitter.com/G1qLC4TgQn

— talkSPORT (@talkSPORT) September 3, 2026

"What do you mean you try and not blow your whistle? So you're playing on when there's a foul? He's just throwing himself under the bus there. And you don't want to leave the centre circle, so you're not seeing the game properly? What an idiot! It doesn't sit right with me at all, like you refereed a lot of the games that I played in. If I were to describe him I would say he's a prat."

Strong words from Agbonlahor, sure. But unjustified? Well, not entirely. A referee's job is to maintain discipline and manage the game fairly on the pitch - how can anyone do that if their internally trying not to blow the whistle, or are too far from a flashpoint to make a correct call?

I thought refereeing with VAR was bad, but refereeing without it truly was the Wild West.